IDLYITL CH 10

Chapter 10

• ────── ✦ ────── •

No One in This World Will Love Me

Warren's clear, grey-blue eyes filled with sorrow, and the surrounding noblewomen looked genuinely heartbroken. Unconsciously, everyone wished for Psyche to accept Warren’s proposal. It was only an invitation to a salon, so why was the wife of a lowly murderer acting so busy?

Warren Demiosis, who could offer such a kind smile to the wife of the man who had crippled him, must surely be an angel in human form. On the other hand, that woman…

The noblewomen gazed at Warren with sympathy and admiration while waiting for Psyche’s answer. Meanwhile, Psyche was cornered, trapped with no escape. With a familiar yet deeply unpleasant feeling creeping over her, she lowered her gaze.

“For the salon… I’ll ask the duke first.”

“Oh, is Ikali already showing signs of being a jealous husband toward his beautiful wife? Can you only leave if you get his permission, because you're so frail and delicate?”

Warren’s playful remarks made the secretary standing next to him smirk. The noblewomen around them also let out a few snickers. Seeing the reaction from the people around him, Warren continued smoothly, like a seasoned actor.

“Well, Ikali does have a childish side. Although we haven’t known each other for many years, adopted brothers are still brothers, right? I know very well how prone he is to sulking.

Speaking warmly about his sworn brother naturally made Warren appear even more likable to those watching.

“Oh my, the Viscount is so kind. If it were me, I’d resent the monster’s wife and seek revenge the moment I saw her.”

“Exactly. Such a rare handsome person has a beautiful soul, too.”

“Compared to that woman, tsk…”

“…”

She had experienced this kind of harassment and blatant scrutiny many times in her past life, but she still couldn't get used to it. Psyche had to tense every muscle in her body to maintain her composure. Meanwhile, Warren observing the whispering crowd, looked Psyche up and down and gave her a leisurely smile.

“Oh dear, look at the time… I’ve kept you too long. I do hope to see you at the salon.”

“…”

“You won't even accept a farewell kiss?”

He looked at her meaningfully. Left with no choice, Psyche extended her hand clad in lace gloves. Warren naturally took it and pressed a kiss to the back of her hand. Psyche squeezed her eyes shut and endured it as faint laughter rose around them.

“Until next time, Princess. Or rather… Duchess.”

After Warren and his entourage disappeared across the square, Psyche got into the carriage without even looking around. When she took off her white lace glove, Anna, sitting across from her, carefully asked,

“...Should I throw that away?”

Psyche silently stared at a corner of the seat and let out a long sigh.

“Let's think about it once we get back to the manor.”

Her head throbbed, and bad memories resurfaced.

• ───────── ☽༓☾ ───────── •

Ikali went for a short horse ride in the afternoon and then took a hot bath. As he stepped out while fastening his robe, his aide Hans stood waiting in the room.

“Madam has sent a letter declining the invitation to the Marchioness Williams’s salon.”

“I see.”

Ikali replied nonchalantly. He habitually opened his cigar case, only to remember he had just bathed, and closed it again.. Instead, he sat on the sofa and buried his face in his hands.

“It would be wise to keep some distance from the Williams, but I'm worried that the Madam hasn't received any other invitations besides that one. She’s been staying at the manor too much.”

“They won't be able to ignore the Duchess forever. Just leave it alone for a while, and the impatient ones will send invitations themselves.”

Hans frowned at Ikali but didn't argue. His master’s response was too nonchalant, as if it were someone else’s problem.

“What's the reason you don't want the Madam to go to the salon?”

“Because I want to keep Psyche from seeing Warren as much as possible.”

“...You’re still holding on to what happened back then?”

Ikali fell silent. But that silence alone was answer enough.

“Isn’t making him a cripple enough?”

“No, not nearly enough.”

“…”

Ikali was being unusually stubborn. Hans openly sighed at his behaviour.

It’s a good thing I stopped him back then, or I would have had to dispose two bodies.

After being missing for ten years, Warren, the biological son of the ducal family,  returned and immediately regained his position. He imprisoned Ikali in a solitary room, completely cutting him off from the outside world.

Four years passed as he lived like a dead man, and then Warren Demiosis suddenly announced that he would marry the Princess of Dawson. As the son of a prestigious ducal family, it wasn't strange for him to marry a princess from a small country.

But a strange rumour began to circulate, that the duke’s son was treating the princess poorly. The angelic son is violent only toward the princess he's about to marry. It was a gossip topic only discussed in exclusive salons, but those who needed to know eventually found out. At times, Ikali thought he could hear the voice of the adoptive father he had killed.

“If you wish, giving you a mere princess from some insignificant country is nothing at all. Warren, you are my only son.”

Whenever that phantom voice surfaced, Ikali felt like he had been transported back to the day he murdered his father.

Hans, being Ikali's only loyal aide, knew a little about those vile rumours and the truth behind them, so he couldn't just ignore Ikali's stubbornness.

Oh, wait. What’s the difference if I clean up two bodies when I’ve already cleaned up one?

But Hans quickly changed his mind. He put his hand on his throbbing head.

“Still, you can't keep them separated forever. We’re constantly detecting signs that Madam Tilly and Viscount Warren are trying to make a comeback in the capital.

“I know.”

“Once they return to the capital, the two of them will stir up high society as if it were their own home. They will eventually run into Madam. Are you going to lock her up in the manor?”

Ikali fell silent.

If such a measure is necessary, why not?

After hesitating, Hans carefully continued,

“And… won’t you soon be leaving for war? You made a promise to His Majesty.”

Ikali leaned deep into the sofa and idly opened and closed the cigar case. As he remained silent about the uncomfortable topic, dark clouds gathered outside. Raindrops began falling over the dim garden, soon turning into a heavy downpour. Psyche still hadn’t returned.

“Get out.”

“But…”

“I said I know. Just get out.”

Ikali turned his back completely and faced the window. It was his way of saying he didn't want to talk anymore. Hans sighed helplessly and left. Watching the rain grow heavier for a long time, he slowly closed his eyes.

The sound of the rain became more and more violent, and the forest near the ridge turned a darker shade of green. Since a low-born murderer took control, no one visited the manor for social purposes.

“It is a quiet and eerie mansion.”

Even he himself agreed with that description.

 • ───────── ☽༓☾ ───────── •

At some point, Ikali drifted into sleep.

The dream began with his earliest memories. The days he had to pick up bread from the ground because he had nothing to eat, the days he was lucky enough to live in an orphanage, and the day a luxurious white carriage glided into the orphanage's courtyard, all flowed together seamlessly.

Back then, the other orphans were like a pack of wolves, their eyes gleaming with the desperate hope of being adopted by a good family.

Everyone wanted to escape that dreadful, miserable life. The only way was to be adopted by a good family. They dreamed of a life where they would meet noble parents who would love them, never go hungry, sleep in a warm room on a wide bed, and be kissed by their parents. But Ikali was different from the other orphans. For no particular reason, he believed no family in the world would ever truly love him.

Then one day, a miracle happened to him. A couple in a luxurious carriage, wearing nice clothes and smelling wonderful, chose him. They wiped the dirt from his face and joyfully declared they would adopt him.

It truly was a dream come true. He couldn't have been luckier. A massive manor and servants. A big room with a private bathroom, a vast garden full of greenery. Clean clothes and hot soup. And… parents, parents, parents…

Young Ikali savoured the unfamiliar word, parents, over and over. Whenever he couldn’t fall asleep because the grand mansion and the wide, clean room felt so unfamiliar, he would roll the word around his tongue like a piece of candy. To him, the word parents was as sweet as a piece of candy.

After being adopted into the ducal family, Ikali did whatever his parents wanted. He underwent intense training and studied diligently, sleeping only three or four hours a night.

For the first time, he became ambitious. He believed that if he became a perfect son, he would be loved forever. He firmly believed that if he could just become perfect, this happiness would last forever.

Until the biological son, Warren, appeared.

“Ah, I knew it. There's no one in this world who will love me.”

After Warren appeared, Ikali was naturally treated like a stray dog by the couple.  No, it would have been better if they just treated him like a stray dog.

They began to regard choosing Ikali as their worst mistake.

Chapter 9

Chapter List

Chapter 11